Paperwork and Boxes

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By Michael W. Raley

I never thought it would happen to me.

I never thought that I would become a statistic,

But here I am.

You are ready to move on and leave me here.

Alone.

After every trial we faced,

Every obstacle we overcame,

This life we built together

Comes down to paperwork and boxes.

I thought we communicated well,

Yet our problems accumulated like the clutter

That has piled up in our home.

I didn’t want this,

I didn’t ask for this,

And I certainly don’t deserve this.

Yet here we are,

Deconstructing a life into paperwork and boxes.

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The Unheeded Dangers

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By Michael W. Raley

I loved you for such a long time,

Maybe I took for granted you’d always be mine.

We had a life, we had a history;

We had love, we had an unspoken chemistry.

We have come to the end of this romantic episode,

As you are willing to leave and hit the road.

I know that in the course of relationships things change

And as situations occur, priorities get rearranged.

Unforunately, in this busyness and bustle,

Two people get lost in the shuffle

Of life, career, family, illness, money, it all piles on

And before you know it, those two youthful kids are gone.

The youthful kids are replaced by strangers

Who did not see the unheeded dangers.

Anger

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By Michael W. Raley

My anger, like the sun,

Rises slowly over the horizon

Penetrating the inner darkness.

No matter the situation,

The anger goads me,

Asking accusing question after accusing question

Until I respond in rage

And say what I’ve been hiding under the surface.

I know it’s not right and that I am better than this,

Yet, I pacify the anger instead of putting it away.

I have only so many cheeks to turn

And only so much humble pie I can eat.

No matter how hard I try,

No matter how much I pray,

No matter how much I change,

The anger grows back like a weed

And I am back to square one.

My Spontaneous Misadventure

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Ever heard the expression,”Go take a hike?” Well, Saturday morning I took that advice to heart. I fixed a bottle of water, put on my hiking boots, grabbed my trusty walking stick, and drove to the park.

I have visited this park probably dozens times over the years along with my wife and our three dogs. This park is maintained beautifully and has numerous paved trails for people to walk and run, but I had to be different.

As I parked my truck and looked at the semi-wooded area in front of me, I thought of a quote from Ralph Waldo Emerson: “Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail.”

I’m going to be a trailblazer.

I set off on my adventure, making my way through brush and tree limbs, crossing the creek in several places.

Then came the end of the line.

The creek serves as a natural boundary between the park and some private property. The “Private Property” and “No Trespassing” signs were my hint to turn around. I consider myself to have a good sense of direction and I followed the creek for a while longer until I decided to go back  to the park.

While crossing the creek again, I slipped and fell in the water. Everything was wet, including my phone. Ugh! I thought this was supposed to be relaxing.

I make my way back up to the land and cross this field. The field ended up being full of thorn bushes. I sucked it up and walked through the field until I came to a clearing. By now, of course my legs look like Freddy Krueger sliced them up.

Now, I am sweaty, wet, dirty, and bloody. What a great adventure!

While I stood in the clearing to catch my breath, I saw a wooden bridge and made my way over there. Turns out it was private property. The elderly gentleman who owned the property was outside. As I start to make my way across the elderly man’s yard, I’m hoping he’s not one of those gun advocates who thinks he’s Clint Eastwood. I don’t want to get shot at. Underneath the elderly man’s truck sat this humongous dog who saw me. At this point, I don’t have the energy to run from this dog. Luckily, the dog didn’t bark or come after me nor did the elderly man say anything to me.

I came out to a two lane country road. I turned left and started hoofing it. My instincts served me well, as I  just knew I was going the right way. I took the country road until it curved into a larger county road. As I walked down the county road, I pulled out my phone, which still worked, and typed “Pioneer Park” into Google Maps. I was only 0.3 miles from the park.

I chose wisely.

I finally get back to the park entrance, where I saw my truck. I drove off and headed for home. My phone is working just fine, I was safe, and heading for home. This little trip filled my adventure quota for a bit.

So my advice if you are ever in that situation, always keep in mind where your destination is and remain calm. Do not panic, remain calm. My hiking adventure served as a metaphor for life as there are many obstacles to face while on the way to your destination. Steady on.

Betrayal

By Michael W. Raley

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I thought I understood the depths of pain,

Until I learned of your betrayal.

Everything we worked for,

Our hopes, our dreams, our history,

Was eradicated with a handful of bad decisions.

I am far from perfect,

But I never thought this would happen.

We don’t deserve this.

I always thought we would be the couple

Who would defy the odds and always stay together,

Alas, it was not meant to be.

I gave you the best years of my life

And I stayed when things went dark

Because I believed not only in you,

But in the person I believed you could be.

Somewhere along the way,

I have failed you and I am sorry.

I worked my hardest and did my best

To build you the life you wanted.

I know there were goals we never reached,

Yet, I was willing to make the best of it with you.

Although I didn’t have the means

To give you everything you wanted,

I gave you the best of me.

I realize now after all these years it wasn’t good enough

Because you no longer want me.

The Problems of Evil, Suffering, and Belief

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The problems of evil and suffering have long been used critics of The Bible to argue against the existence of an Omnipotent, or all-powerful God. In recent years, I have become very skeptical of the mental gymnastics required to ignore this problem. If we were to be intellectually honest with ourselves, I believe we would have some major doubts about our religious worldviews.

I know many times I have accepted my suffering as “part of God’s plan,” because “God has something great” for me. If no one had an explanation, then the standard responses are, “God’s ways are above our ways,” or “We’ll have all of the answers when we get to heaven.” I’m sorry, but that is no longer good enough for me. The story of Adam and Eve’s fall in the Garden of Eden is not a sufficient explanation when examined logically.

Besides being Omnipotent, Christians believe God to be Omniscient,or all-knowing. If God, with one glance of his eyes can see across all history and time, then why do we have the Garden of Eden story?

*God creates the angel Lucifer knowing that he will lead a rebellion and will be cast out of heaven with one-third of the angels.

*God creates a paradise, but with the proviso of a forbidden tree, which will keep Adam and Eve in perpetual ignorance if they stay away from it.

*So if Lucifer wasn’t created and the forbidden tree wasn’t put in the garden, then the talking snake would not have convinced Adam and Eve to eat the forbidden fruit, which caused the fall of humanity.

*The all-powerful God could have dealt with sin and Satan right then and there, restored everything, hence there would have been no need for a worldwide flood, the sacrifice of Christ, or the need for a Second Coming of Christ to finally vanquish Satan and his minions.

*The idea that my suffering, your suffering, and the suffering of untold billions is due solely to the fact a talking snake convinced two people to eat a piece of fruit does not hold up upon further review. If your great-grandfather robbed a bank in 1925, decades before you were born and the police show up at your door to arrest you for your great-grandfather’s crime and throw you in prison, that would be ludicrious.

Let’s take another biblical example of innocent people suffering because of one person’s actions. If you are a reader of The Bible, no doubt you are familiar with the Exodus story of Moses leading the Israelites out of slavery in Egypt. Moses, on behalf of God, goes before Pharaoh to “Let my people go.”

However, Pharaoh refuses and God sends plagues on Egypt, which included the Nile River turning to blood, flies, boils, darkness, etc, which culminated with the death of every first born child in the land of Egypt. On the surface of the story, Pharaoh seems to be a very stubborn person who will allow innocent people to suffer over the fate of slaves. However, The Bible states in Exodus 4:21, 7:3, 9:12,11:9, and 14:8, that it was God who hardened Pharaoh’s heart, which brought on the plagues, which brought on the suffering of Egyptians not involved with Moses or Pharaoh. Why didn’t God just deal directly with Pharaoh? In fact the Exodus story doesn’t mention any direct punishment Pharaoh received due to his actions against God’s people, but innocent people suffered because of the stubbornness God put on Pharaoh.

Isaiah 45:7 states, “I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the Lord do all these things.” (KJV).

Isaiah 45:7 is a verse used by theologians and apologists to describe evil as “natural evil,” such as earthquakes, hurricanes, tornadoes, volcanic eruptions, and the like. God can use this kind of “evil” for his purpose to bring healing to a community or country, for which the disaster can be used “for his glory.” I believe this begs the question, why does God have to use suffering in order for people to pay attention to him? Why did God allow Job to suffer so much, yet give him no explanation? It was God, after all, who put the limits on Job’s suffering. If God is all-powerful, then can’t he simply manifest himself in a definitive way?

I am not belittling anyone’s faith and I am not saying you should or shouldn’t believe in God. However, if we are to base our lives and possible eternities on beliefs laid out in ancient texts, can we still apply logic and reason to what we believe? Is it still viable in our modern world to question the advances of science and society in order to hold onto a book that insists the world was created in six days, slavery is allowed, women are to be treated as property, and genocide is encouraged? We must examine the heart of these issues and what we believe. We have been given the gifts of logic, reason, free thought, and common sense let us use them to the best of our abilities. I will leave you with a quote from the 4th/3rd Century BC Greek philosopher Epicurus:

“Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able? Then he is not omnipotent. If he is able, but not willing? Then he is malevolent. Is he both able and willing? Then whence cometh evil? Is he neither able nor willing? Then why call him God?”

It’s Over

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By Michael W. Raley

It’s over.

It’s really over.

After all we’ve been through,

Every joy,

Every laugh,

Every tear,

Every struggle,

Every trial,

You want out.

I want to stay and fight,

But that is not what you want.

I’ve dedicated my life to you,

Yet, it’s still not good enough,

For you want to ditch our history, our roots

In order to fly away.

For what it’s worth,

I want you to stay, but

You don’t want to work it out.

If we have reached this impasse,

This unforeseen insurmountable hurdle,

This obstacle we can’t get around,

Then I guess it’s over.